Today the cosmos aligned and something rare happened. It was a daddy daughter night at the Williams Home, and to join in on the fun my little niece from Taylorsville came over. I was the adult chaperon for these two beautiful and MOBILE girls for only two hours. To help you understand the picture I need to first help you understand a typical night in our home.

I come home from work or school usually around 10 at night. When I walk through the door my wife looks like she has just descended from Mount Olympus where she has been trading beauty secrets with Aphrodite.

I give her a kiss and sit down to a perfect succulent meal. Where does the meal come from? I have no clue, the only groceries I buy is cake for Friday Night Cake Night and on a rare occasion when we run out chocolate chips for Saturday Night Cookie Night. I have never seen the groceries before yet here they are prepared in perfect harmony for my enjoying.

Evelyn is already prepared for bed and has been kept up so that I could play with her for a short time before she goes down for the night. I kiss her good night and poof she is out. The house looks like it was just cleaned and prepped for a commercial. Everything is perfect and I am so glad for the comforts of home.

Now let’s zoom back to the present. Meredith walks through the door to what must be the site of a nuclear explosion. The picture you see is after I have “cleaned up.” I am still in my work clothes, which have become a collage of baby food, spit up, formula, and milk. If you will look at the sink you will see the Dr. Pepper that I had for dinner. Evelyn has won the fight and I conceded to letting her eat a plastic bag for dinner. And Shayla, who knows what Shayla ate?

Where is the father in this picture that is supposed to be watching these kids? I am sitting in the chair doing exactly that, watching them tear through Meredith's purse.

What is the solution to this disaster? Fathers, our only choice is to unionize to prevent cross job training!